Praising
intelligence can hinder children’s intellectual development. Instead, embrace a
growth mindset and praise hard work and evolving abilities, which can lead to
greater success.
We all enjoy being praised. It’s a quick
ego-boost and makes us feel good about ourselves. So it’s only natural
that we want our kids to feel the same way. We think that if they feel good
about themselves, then results and performance will follow suit. But are all
praises created equal?
When a child excels at something, should you
say: “Wow, you’re really smart”? Or is it better to go with: “Wow, you must
have worked really hard on this”? Do the subtle differences even matter?
According to Dr Paul O’Keefe, Assistant
Professor of Psychology at Yale-NUS College, research shows they do. Not all
praises are the same and it is useful for parents and teachers to know the
difference.
“When we praise intelligence, what we’re
saying is that the reason you did well is that you have a natural ability,” he
said. “So it’s communicating to them that intelligence is an entity that you
have or you don’t.”
Such compliments present pitfalls. When kids
believe that they have a fixed level of intelligence, they can struggle to
overcome setbacks and failures.
Dr O’Keefe referred to a seminal study from
1998, conducted by two researchers, Claudia Mueller and Carol Dweck.
Fifth-grade students were each given an easy task to complete, which they did
successfully.
Half of them were then praised for their
ability while the others were praised for their effort. When the children were
asked to complete a second, highly challenging task, the results were
startling.
“Those who were praised for their ability
didn’t persist or perform well,” he explained. “The others who were praised for
their effort did better, because they came to understand that their hard work
would pay off on the second task as it did with the first.”
How a fixed mindset can be dangerous
This contrast in how children perform can be
explained by “growth” versus “fixed” intelligence mindsets. When children are
praised for their effort, they believe that they can become more capable with
hard work, and is what psychologists call a growth mindset of intelligence.
However, praising children for intelligence
leads them to believe that they excel due to innate qualities they possess.
When they do not succeed, they tend to attribute it to not being smart enough.
In other words, they develop a fixed mindset.
Dr O’Keefe shared that he was first exposed to
the theory when he was a researcher at Yale University.
The theory gels with his personal experiences.
“I had a fixed mindset when I was young. I was a defeatist,” he said. He
explained that growing up, many people in his social environment had fixed
mindsets too, and it influenced him to think that way, whether it was through
what they said, or by observing how they responded to setbacks.
But after attending a lecture on this topic of
mindsets, it set him thinking. “I thought to myself: what if I tried really
hard? Let’s just see what happens. After that, I just started getting ‘A’s, and
had one success after another, which reinforced the idea that intelligence was,
in fact, developable” he said.
People also have mindsets about interest
In collaboration with Carol Dweck and Greg
Walton of Stanford, Dr O’Keefe has examined fixed and growth mindsets in a
different domain: people’s interests. Those with a fixed mindset tend to
abandon budding interests when the tasks become difficult, he noted.
This is because people holding a fixed mindset
of interest tend to believe that they possess an inherent interest that will
make pursuing the new interest relatively easy once discovered. When they
encounter challenges and setbacks, they may interpret it as a sign that it was
not their true interest after all.
On the flipside, people with a growth mindset
are more likely to persist. They believe that interests are developed over time
rather than inherent, and therefore maintain interests when they become
difficult to pursue.
“People with a growth mindset of interest
maintain interests because they do not expect it to always be easy. They see
interests as a developmental process, and every developmental process is going
to have its ups and downs,” he said.
Developing a growth mindset in kids
How do you build a growth mindset in children?
First, when talking about intelligence, the
manner in which parents offer feedback is critical. When kids fail or face
setbacks, do not say: “You didn’t get it”. Instead, opt for a more positive
one: “You haven’t gotten it yet”.
The latter phrasing could alter how children
perceive the nature of their abilities. Rather than berating them for not being
capable enough, suggest to them that they can improve and help them learn how
to seek the right solutions.
Feedback should gear children toward future
improvement and not focus on past shortcomings, he added. This helps kids
understand that every obstacle can be overcome with effort or the right
strategy.
Second, when cultivating a child’s interests,
do not maintain clear and strict delineation between subjects. Instead of
saying a child is arts- or science-oriented, for example, keep the options
open. Help children understand that different subjects are interconnected and
that they can develop interests in many subjects; they do not have a
predetermined set of interests.
“Why can’t you enjoy both the arts and
sciences? Why can’t one area complement and enhance the other? Look at
technology company Apple. It’s a perfect example of how the arts and technology
can be integrated. You’ll often end up with more innovative ideas if you see
connections among the disciplines rather than only within them,” said Dr
O’Keefe, adding that the Yale-NUS Common Curriculum takes a multidisciplinary
approach and combines both arts and science-related courses.
With regard to cultivating growth mindsets of
intelligence and interest, parents also need to go beyond endorsing a growth
mindset to living by example. When parents make an effort to pick up new skills
and interests, they become role models to children who will better understand
the concept of growth mindset where intelligence and interests are not fixed.
For example, parents could show their
children—through their own actions—that they, too, believe their own interests
are not fixed. They could pursue new interests and stick with them even when
they get difficult, he shared. Parents may want to pursue a new subject, for
instance. If you are trained in science, why not learn more about the arts, and
try to pick up music, singing, or learn to play an instrument?
So it’s never too late to start developing
another interest—or even another skill—today. When was the last time you learnt
something new?
Source: schoolbag